Relationship work

Many times, relationship problems bow up ‘out of nowhere’, often because a few basic rules of sharing life and home with another individual are often either misunderstood or ignored completely. Here are three useful pointers:

In an argument (and we *do* all have them!) begin every sentence with “I” where you can. It’s very difficult to be provocative when you do this, and provocation never helped resolve an argument. Of course you wouldn’t try to WIN an argument would you!?! In a worthwhile relationship an argument should be about solving a difference, not scoring a win.

“I feel sick when we’re like this,” is far more self-sufficient and constructive than: “You make me sick!”

“The trouble is, I always feel…” is much better than “The trouble with YOU is…”

“I don’t understand what you mean,” is ok. “You never make any sense!” is not.

You get the idea…

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Posted in Behaviours, Communication, Relationships, Resources, Techniques Tagged with: , , , ,

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